ANCIENT LAW: "Thou shall not eat meat with dairy"
MODERN TRANSLATION: "Thou shall not eat luscious, rich dairy desserts after eating a succulent steak".
HOME-TRUTH: This law is anti-dessertist. The only people who suffer from this law are those, like me, who have a sweet tooth and love nothing more than to follow a hearty meaty meal (I do love animals, but I love steak more) with a rich, creamy chocolate covered, ice cream lathered, cream dolloped dairylicious dessert.
What is the solution to this age old conundrum? The answer is deceptively obvious - make it dairy free. While most recipes can be converted, the end product almost always screams "dairy-free dessert!" Whether it is your tongue crying out for the texture of real cream and the lightness of milk or whether it is the ever present nutty undertone when using soy milk, it is never quite right. That is until I transformed a milky teacake recipe into a versatile, quick and never fail cake. This recipe can be adapted and adjusted to suit all tastes and toppings, but it tends to work best with fruit in, on or between the layers.
This humble teacake, a now favourite post meat dessert, was revolutionised when my Mother-in-law bought me some vibrant Rhubarb sticks from the market. Like me, she appreciates all things home baked (in fact, me writing this blog was her brainchild!) and often supplies me with delicious fresh produce that creep their way into my baked goods. The only issue was that I had Rhubarbaphobia. Symptoms of this rare condition include hiding behind the apple stand in order to avoid eye-contact with aforementioned product and a systematic avoidance of all (Rhu)barbs which may, or may not, fly my way. Oh...I also thought some part, and I wasn't exactly sure which part, of Rhubarbs were poisonous. Thus, I had never used them, lest any of my friends or family had the following inscription on their graves "Death by Rhubarb". However, this time it was different, I was captivated by their shiny rosy skins and elegant shape. I had to use them.
OUTCOME:
1. Delicious dairy-free cake that tastes dairy filled.
2. Radiant Roasted Rhubarb covered dessert.
In the words of the ever wise Homer J. Simpson:
"Mmmmm...sacrilicious!"
Roasted rhubarb
10 sticks (approx. 300g) of Rhubarb (leaves removed - they ARE poisonous)
1/4 cup caster sugar
Zest of one lemon
1 tsp custard powder (to make the glaze)
Cut up 7 sticks of Rhubarb into 2 inch pieces. Leave 3 sticks whole in length. Place rhubarb onto a lined baking tray and sprinkle with caster sugar and grated zest. Allow to sit for 5 minutes (or until you see juices starting to form). Then bake for 10 minutes covered at 200 degrees Celsius, then uncover and roast for a further 5 minutes. Remove from the oven and drain the juices into a glass (it produces about a 1/2 cup, but the amount will differ depending on the Rhubarbs). Set the Rhubarb and juice aside.
Tea cake
120g margarine
1 cup caster sugar
2 eggs
4 tsp vanilla essence
2 cups self raising flour
2/3 cup pulp free orange juice
1 tbsp soft brown sugar
Jam of you choice (for cake assembling)
Lower the oven to 180 degrees. Line and grease two 20cm baking tins. Cream margarine, sugar, eggs and vanilla for two minutes. Add the sifted flour alternating with the orange juice until finished (ending with the flour). Divide the batter into two tins. Top the one cake with the chopped roasted Rhubarb (this will form the bottom layer of your cake) and top the second cake with whole Rhubarb pieces arranged decoratively. Sprinkle a little bit of brown sugar on top of the second cake only (it helps to caramelize the rhubarb).
In order to avoid my mistake ensure that you don't place too much Rhubarb in the center of the top layer cake as it will prohibit the rising of the cake and even baking. Bake for 27 minutes (or until a skewer comes out clean from the center).
Once you remove the cakes from the oven and place them onto a cooling tray, you can move on to making the Rhubarb glaze that will be brushed onto the cake once cooled. Place the Rhubarb juices into a small saucepan and blend 1 tsp of custard powder into it with a fork making sure you removes the lumps. Put the saucepan over a low flame and gently heat the mixture, while continuously stirring. It will become cloudy before becoming clear again and the juices will gradually thicken. When it takes on the consistency of jelly just before it sets remove from the flame (it will become slightly thicker as it cools).
To assemble the cake place the bottom layer on a serving tray and generously spread with jam (I used an apple and cinnamon jam which was delicious, but any jam will work beautifully). Carefully place the top layer on top of the jam, gently pressing down to secure it. Then take a brush and generously lather on the Rhubarb glaze (it gives it a lovely shine and pinkish colour).
Then cut a massive slice and enjoy (I promise, it won't kill you)!
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